Crambrulee » funny

Percentages Mastered

crambosauce — Sun, 19 Jul 2009 01:16:19 +0000

Parent: how about you eat 100% of those peas?
6 Year Old: duuude, that would be all of them!

Batman Rules

crambosauce — Sat, 16 May 2009 23:37:34 +0000

Saw this on the way home from work a couple weeks ago. Bad. Ass. Hopefully you can see it, click the image to enlarge.

Batman Logo in Rear Window

Don’t Do It

crambosauce — Thu, 12 Mar 2009 20:35:13 +0000

When typing in the address bar of your your browser, be sure you include the dot between gmail and com. Safari 4 beta adds the dot-com, which is a nice feature. Thanks!

You Don’t Even KNOW!

crambosauce — Wed, 11 Mar 2009 00:21:33 +0000

Dane Cook OMG I can’t stop laughing

Long version is here (Bad Relationships and Brain Ninjas)

It’s a Technology Thing

crambosauce — Sat, 24 Jan 2009 01:12:50 +0000

Me: How can you play your DS while it’s charging?
7 year old: It’s just a technology thing.

Bye-Bye Poopies!

crambosauce — Sun, 04 Jan 2009 14:55:15 +0000

Might as well just poop in the river!

Figurative Language Lesson #36

crambosauce — Sun, 21 Dec 2008 15:15:19 +0000

This conversation took place this morning while I was up cooking french toast:

Spawn [approaching the kitchen]: Where are the cinnamon rolls?
Me: Over here.
Spawn: Where’s the one with my name on it?
Me: There aren’t any names on them. What are you talking about?
Spawn: Dad said there’s a cinnamon roll out here with my name on it.
Me explaining what the difference is between literal and figurative language.

He eats cinnamon rolls like other people eat muffins — top down.

I Want A Pink Thingamajig

crambosauce — Wed, 19 Nov 2008 01:09:18 +0000

So I found out about this new toy website today. You know, the kind of toys you don’t want your kid to find on Sunday morning when he gets up before you cuz you’re sleeping in and don’t want him to ask what it is but when he does you certaintly don’t want daddy to tell him it’s mommy’s as a total cop out so mommy then has to explain that it’s something for grownups and DON’T TOUCH IT!!

Anyway. So I pulled up this website on the iPhone on the way home from work. Well, you know how when you go to Safari the next time and the last site you viewed comes up? At dinner I was asked to look up something on the Internet and brought up Safari on the phone while father-in-law looked over my shoulder.

There was this website zoomed in on the last product I was checking out in all its glorious beauty.

I couldn’t get off that page fast enough. I’m hoping it looked to him like a pink USB thumb drive.

UPDATE: This is the image that was seen. NSFW you have been warned. (I was less concerned about the pink thing and more about the two rosebud-topped things it’s nestled between.)

Jello Nipples

crambosauce — Wed, 29 Oct 2008 06:57:12 +0000

My favorite thing about eating sugar-free Jello? Pulling back the foil cap and finding the perfect little jello nipple underneath! How does it get there? The jello isn’t touching the foil in any way and the surface of the jello is perfectly smooth. Where did the nipple come from? Wherever it comes from, it tastes delicious.

Jello Nipple

Is It Wrong That I Laughed?

crambosauce — Wed, 15 Oct 2008 00:53:18 +0000

Spawn #1 (5 years old) was playing with a couple of rubber balls – throwing them up the stairs, tossing them around the basement, generally being very silly. When he’s silly he babbles to himself – diarrhea of the mouth – nonstop, constant gibberish I am usually quite good at tuning out. However, he said something that caught my attention:

Him: [blah blah] balls [blah blah] face
Me: What did you just say?
Him: I love these balls in my face!

I couldn’t stop laughing. Was that wrong of me?